How to Improve Your Emotional Intelligence?

Emotional Intelligence

Developing Strong "People Skills"

We probably all know people, either at work or in our personal lives, who are really good listeners. No matter what kind of situation we're in, they always seem to know just what to say – and how to say it – so that we're not offended or upset. They're caring and considerate, and even if we don't find a solution to our problem, we usually leave feeling more hopeful and optimistic.

We probably also know people who are masters at managing their emotions. They don't get angry in stressful situations. Instead, they have the ability to look at a problem and calmly find a solution. They're excellent decision makers, and they know when to trust their intuition. Regardless of their strengths, however, they're usually willing to look at themselves honestly. They take criticism well, and they know when to use it to improve their performance.

People like this have a high degree of emotional intelligence. They know themselves very well, and they're also able to sense the emotional needs of others.

Would you like to be more like this?

As more and more people accept that emotional intelligence is just as important to professional success as technical ability, organizations are increasingly using it when they hire and promote.

For example, one large cosmetics company recently revised their hiring process for salespeople to choose candidates based on their emotional intelligence. The result? People hired with the new system have sold, on average, $91,000 more than salespeople selected under the old system. There has also been significantly lower staff turnover among the group chosen for their emotional intelligence.

So, what exactly is emotional intelligence, and what can you do to improve yours?

What Is Emotional Intelligence?

We all have different personalities, different wants and needs, and different ways of showing our emotions. Navigating through this all takes tact and cleverness – especially if we hope to succeed in life. This is where emotional intelligence becomes important.

Emotional intelligence is the ability to recognize your emotions, understand what they're telling you, and realize how your emotions affect people around you. It also involves your perception of others: when you understand how they feel, this allows you to manage relationships more effectively.

People with high emotional intelligence are usually successful in most things they do. Why? Because they're the ones that others want on their team. When people with high emotional intelligence send an email, it gets answered. When they need help, they get it. Because they make others feel good, they go through life much more easily than people who are easily angered or upset.

Characteristics of Emotional Intelligence

Developing a framework of five elements that define emotional intelligence:

1. Self-Awareness – People with high emotional intelligence are usually very self-aware. They understand their emotions, and because of this, they don't let their feelings rule them. They're confident – because they trust their intuition and don't let their emotions get out of control.

   They're also willing to take an honest look at themselves. They know their strengths and weaknesses, and they work on these areas so they can perform better. Many people believe that this self-awareness is the most important part of emotional intelligence.

2. Self-Regulation – This is the ability to control emotions and impulses. People who self-regulate typically don't allow themselves to become too angry or jealous, and they don't make impulsive, careless decisions. They think before they act. Characteristics of self-regulation are thoughtfulness, comfort with change, integrity and the ability to say no.
3. Motivation – People with a high degree of emotional intelligence are usually motivated. They're willing to defer immediate results for long-term success. They're highly productive, love a challenge, and are very effective in whatever they do.
4. Empathy – This is perhaps the second-most important element of emotional intelligence. Empathy is the ability to identify with and understand the wants, needs, and viewpoints of those around you. People with empathy are good at recognizing the feelings of others, even when those feelings may not be obvious. As a result, empathetic people are usually excellent at managing relationships, listening and relating to others. They avoid stereotyping and judging too quickly, and they live their lives in a very open, honest way.
5. Social Skills – It's usually easy to talk to and like people with good social skills, another sign of high emotional intelligence. Those with strong social skills are typically team players. Rather than focus on their own success first, they help others develop and shine. They can manage disputes, are excellent communicators, and are masters at building and maintaining relationships.

As you've probably determined, emotional intelligence can be a key to success in your life – especially in your career. The ability to manage people and relationships is very important in all leaders, so developing and using your emotional intelligence can be a good way to show others the leader inside of you.

How to Improve Your Emotional Intelligence

The good news is that emotional intelligence can be learned and developed. As well as working on your skills in the five areas above, use these strategies:

• Observe how you react to people. Do you rush to judgment before you know all of the facts? Do you stereotype? Look honestly at how you think and interact with other people. Try to put yourself in thier place and be more open and accepting of their perspectives and needs.
• Look at your work environment. Do you seek attention for your accomplishments? Humility can be a wonderful quality, and it doesn't mean that you're shy or lack self-confidence. When you practice humility, you say that you know what you did, and you can be quietly confident about it. Give others a chance to shine – put the focus on them, and don't worry too much about getting praise for yourself.
• Do a self-evaluation. Try out our emotional intelligence quiz. What are your weaknesses? Are you willing to accept that you're not perfect and that you could work on some areas to make yourself a better person? Have the courage to look at yourself honestly – it can change your life.
• Examine how you react to stressful situations. Do you become upset every time there's a delay or something doesn't happen the way you want? Do you blame others or become angry at them, even when it's not their fault? The ability to stay calm and in control in difficult situations is highly valued – in the business world and outside it. Keep your emotions under control when things go wrong.
• Take responsibility for your actions. If you hurt someone's feelings, apologize directly – don't ignore what you did or avoid the person. People are usually more willing to forgive and forget if you make an honest attempt to make things right.
• Examine how your actions will affect others – before you take those actions. If your decision will impact others, put yourself in their place. How will they feel if you do this? Would you want that experience? If you must take the action, how can you help others deal with the effects?

Key Points

Although "regular" intelligence is important to success in life, emotional intelligence is key to relating well to others and achieving your goals. Many people believe that it is at least as important as regular intelligence, and many companies now use emotional intelligence testing to hire new staff.

Emotional intelligence is an awareness of your actions and feelings – and how they affect those around you. It also means that you value others, listen to their wants and needs, and are able to empathize or identify with them on many different levels.

Kranti Gaurav

IIT Madras

Dead Sea or Live Sea, What do u wanna be?

Here is an interesting story on two seas with some interesting lessons. I had heard of Dead Sea in school. No one ever told me this side of the story. You may find it interesting. I look forward to your perspective.

__________________________

A tale of Two Seas ! As you probably recall, the Dead Sea is really a Lake, not a sea.It’s so high in salt content that the human body can float easily. You can almost lie down and read a book! The salt in the Dead Sea is as high as 35% - almost 10 times the normal ocean water. And all that saltiness has meant that there is no life at all in the Dead Sea. No fish. No vegetation. No sea animals. Nothing lives in the Dead Sea.  And hence the name: Dead Sea.

The other Sea is the Sea of Galilee. Turns out that the Sea of Galilee is just north of the Dead Sea. Both the Sea of Galilee and the Dead Sea receive their water from river Jordan. And yet, they are very, very different.

 

Unlike the Dead Sea, the Sea of Galilee is pretty, resplendent with rich, colorful marine life. There are lots of plants. And lots of fish too. In fact, the Sea of Galilee is home to over twenty different types of fishes.

Same region, same source of water, and yet while one sea is full of life, the other is dead. How come?

 

Here’s apparently why. The River Jordan flows into the Sea of Galilee and then flows out. The water simply passes through the Sea of Galilee in and then out - and that keeps the sea healthy and vibrant, teeming with marine life.

 

But the Dead Sea is so far below the mean sea level, that it has no outlet. The water flows in from the river Jordan, but does not flow out. There are no outlet streams. It is estimated that over 7 million tons of water evaporate from the Dead Sea every day. Leaving it salty. Too full of minerals. And unfit for any marine life.

 

The Dead Sea takes water from the River Jordan, and holds it. It does not give.

 

Result? No life at all.

 

Think about it.

 

Life is not just about getting. Its about giving. We all need to be a bit like the Sea of Galilee.

We are fortunate to get wealth, knowledge, love and respect. But if we don't learn to give, we could all end up like the Dead Sea. The love and the respect, the wealth and the knowledge could all evaporate. Like the water in the Dead Sea.

 

If we get the Dead Sea mentality of merely taking in more water, more money, more everything the results can be disastrous.

Good idea to make sure that in the sea of your own life, you have outlets. Many outlets. For love and wealth - and everything else that you get in your life. Make sure you don't just get, you give too.

 

Open the taps. And you'll open the floodgates to happiness. Make that a habit to share and experience life... Experience the magic!

Lost Your Donkey, Find Your Destiny

Once a man was going to market with his donkey who was carrying two sacks of rice. After a while, man stopped on his way to rest under a tree. He tied his donkey near that tree.

Rope was loosely tied. When he woke up from his nap, he couldn’t find his donkey around. Man got worried and started searching for his donkey everywhere.

While searching for his donkey, he met a boy and asked, “Have you seen my donkey?”

Boy replied, “Is your donkey blind from left eye and has lame right foot. Was he carrying load of rice?”

Man got happy that now he will be able to find his donkey and said, “Yes..! yes..! that’s my donkey. Where have you seen it?”

Boy answered, “I haven’t seen it.”

Man thought to himself, “How could have boy known so much about my donkey without seeing it. May be he had stolen my donkey.”

Man asked boy again about his donkey. Boys still told him that he hadn’t seen. Man got angry and took boy to village chief for solution.

Man said to village chief that boy had stolen his donkey and now refusing to tell him about his donkey. Boy still insisted that he hadn’t seen his donkey.

Chief asked boy, “Dear boy, if you hadn’t seen donkey then how could you describe him so well.?”

Boy replied, “I saw tracks of donkey on my way. Donkey’s foot steps of right were different from left and from that i understood that donkey that passed from that way was limping.

Then i saw that grass on right side was eaten but not on left side, from this i understood that donkey’s was blind from left eye.

There were grains of rice scattered on the ground on way, donkey had passed. From that i understood that donkey must be carrying load of rice.”

Village chief understood that boy was not guilty and praised him for his cleverness. Man understood his mistake and left to find his donkey.

Moral: We should not be too Quick to Judge Other’s.

The Power & Value of Employee Engagement

There are several definitions of employee engagement. However, it can be said that in broad terms, employee engagement brings together job satisfaction, motivation, work effort, organisational commitment, shared purpose, energy and ‘flow’.

In this way, employee engagement describes an internal state of being – physical, mental and emotional – and can also include behaviour, such as commitment and ‘going the extra mile’.

Gathering and measuring engagement

You may have come across employee attitude surveys or focus groups, employee boards and other ways in which engagement is recorded and measured. The advantage of a survey is that it provides a representative sample from across the whole organisation and scores can be tracked over time to see if actions are improving engagement. However, whether or not it is anonymous will have some influence on the way in which people respond.

Focus groups may have a similar challenge; however, by being open forums for discussion they allow organisations to get more qualitative data, and if necessary ask further questions to explore responses in more depth.

When measuring employee engagement by whichever means you choose, it is important that employees feel they can respond honestly without fear of repercussion, and that they feel any issues they raise will be responded to. This isn’t telling them that any reasons for dissatisfaction will necessarily be fixed, but that they will be heard and responded to.

Employee engagement is a workplace approach designed to ensure that employees are committed to their organization's goals, objectives and values, encouraged to contribute to organizational success, and are able at the same time to enhance their own sense of well-being. The importance of employee engagement can't be overstated – employee engagement strategies have been proven to reduce staff turnover, improve productivity and efficiency, retain customers at a higher rate, and make more profits. Most importantly, engaged employees are happier, both at work and in their lives. Employee engagement is a property of the relationship between an organization and its employees. An “engaged employee” is one who is fully absorbed by and enthusiastic about their work and so takes positive action to further the organization's reputation and interests. Employees could appear contented at work but this does not necessarily mean that they are engaged in the true sense. These employees may turn up at work without complaining and get along to doing their tasks of the day. However, making them happy is far different from making them engaged.

Top 5 Things HR Can Do to Improve Employee Engagement:

• Create a Proper Strategy to Start Educating and Supporting Your Workforce.
• Establish Strong Leadership Progression for Business Goals.
• Close the Perceived Gap Between HR and Other Employees.
• Organizational Design & Change Management.
• Driving the Change to Digital Business Transformation.

Engaged employees are happier and therefore typically provide better service to their colleagues and customers, as a result of being positive and proactive. Ensuring great customer service is a huge win for the company, ensuring happy customers into the future. The more engaged your employees are the more efficient and productive they become, and that certainly can't be a bad thing! A study by Wyatt Watson found that companies that have highly engaged employees produce 26% higher revenue per employee. A different study by the World Economic Forum and the Harvard School of Public Health reports employees with healthy habits are 3.1 times more productive than their unhealthy peers. While there are a lot of factors that contribute to productivity in the workplace, healthy employees set the bar high. Managers often mistake employees that are happy while they are taking part in staff meetings or company events, as being engaged employees. An engaged employee cares about their work and about the performance of the company, and they want to feel that their efforts could make a difference. It is generally seen as an internal state of mind; physically, mentally and emotionally that binds together the work effort, commitment and satisfaction in an employee.

चील और मुर्गी की कहानी

एक जंगल में बरगद का पेड़ था. उस पेड़ के ऊपर एक चील घोंसला बनाकर रहती थी जहाँ उसने अंडे दे रखे थे. उसी पेड़ के नीचे एक जंगली मुर्गी ने भी अंडे दे रखें थे. एक दिन उस चील के अंडों में से एक अंडा नीचे गिरा और मुर्गी के अंडों में जाकर मिल गया.

समय बीता अंडा फूटा और चील का बच्चा उस अंडे से निकला और वह यह सोचते बड़ा हुआ की वो एक मुर्गी है. वो मुर्गी के बांकी बच्चों के साथ बड़ा हुआ. वह उन्ही कामों को करता जिन्हें एक मुर्गी करती है. वो मुर्गी की तरह ही कुड़कुड़ाता, जमीन खोद कर दाने चुगता और वो इतना ही ऊँचा उड़ पाता जितना की एक मुर्गी उड़ती है.

एक दिन उसने आसमान में एक चील को देखा जो बड़ी शान से उड़ रही थी. उसने अपनी मुर्गी माँ से पूछा की उस चिड़िया का क्या नाम है जो इतना ऊँचा बड़ी शान से उड़ रही है. मुर्गी ने जबाब दिया वह एक चील है. फिर चील के बच्चे ने पूछा माँ मैं इतना ऊँचा क्यों नहीं उड़ पाता। मुर्गी बोली तुम इतना ऊँचा नहीं उड़ सकते क्योंकि तुम एक मुर्गे हो. उसने मुर्गी की बात मान ली और मुर्गे की जिंदगी जीता हुआ एक दिन मर गया. 

कहानी से सीख |

जो भी हम सोचते हैं या कुछ नया करने की कोशिश करते हैं तो दूसरे हमें यह कहकर रोकते हैं कि तुम ऐसा नहीं कर सकते, ऐसा नहीं हो सकता और हम अपना इरादा यह सोचकर बदल लेते हैं कि वाकई मैं यह नहीं कर सकता और हार मान लेते हैं.

इसका मुख्य कारण है अपने ऊपर भरोसा न होना, अपनी शक्तिओं पर भरोसा न होना, अपने काम पर भरोसा न होना. दोस्तों जो लोग कहते हैं कहने दीजिये लोगों का काम है कहना, अपने आप पर भरोसा रखें, अपने आप को पहचाने. दोस्तों अगर जीत निश्चित हो तो कायर भी लड़ जाते हैं , बहादुर वो कहलाते हैं, जो हार निश्चित हो, फिर भी मैदान नहीं छोड़ते!

The Power of Peace by Kranti Gaurav

Having a manner of peace and quiet is extremely valuable. It's a disposition that says, "I'm confiding in God," and it talks intensely to individuals. Be that as it may, it requires significant investment, center and the beauty of God to be reliably serene.

One approach to create predictable peace is to figure out how to live "in the now." We can invest a great deal of energy considering the past or pondering what's on the horizon… however we can't achieve anything unless our psyche is centered around today.

The Bible reveals to us that God gives us elegance for every day that we live. I trust that beauty is the power, enablement or vitality to do what we have to do—and He gives it liberally, as we require it.

We have to settle on a choice each morning to state, "God has given me today. I will cheer and be happy in it."

The Real Source of Stress 

Time and again our anxiety is tied up in our conditions. You could be focused on the grounds that you're generally occupied or you're battling monetarily or on the grounds that you're not coexisting with somebody you cherish.

It could be various things, however's intriguing that these circumstances are not the reason for your pressure. Stress is truly caused by your response to every circumstance.

We don't need to work at endeavoring to dispose of each unpleasant circumstance. We have to figure out how to grasp peace.

It couldn't be any more obvious, we're continually attempting to dispose of everything that annoys us. In any case, the Bible says that on the planet there will be tribulation. That is the reason Jesus stated, "Brighten up, I have conquered the world."

We don't need to work at endeavoring to dispose of each distressing circumstance. We have to figure out how to grasp peace.

7 Ways to Practice Peace 

I trust that one of the keys to keeping up peace in your life is to step toward peace consistently. Here are a couple of tips for having a more serene way of life.

1. Be particular with how you invest your energy. You might endeavor to do an excessive number of things and wind up doing none of them well. Hustling is attempting to accomplish more than the Holy Spirit is driving you to do. Be driven by the Spirit.

2. Be set up to state no pleasantly. Now and again we go up against things we know we shouldn't, on the grounds that we're awkward saying no. On the off chance that you feel this weight, request that God put your soul very still and give you adoring words to talk that will take away the pointless cumbersomeness of saying no.

3. Oppose the soul of tarrying. The disposition says I will stay here and hold up until the point that I have a craving for doing what I have to do. In any case, God's Word instructs us to practice self-control. Do what you have to do now so you can completely make the most of your seasons of rest.

4. Dispense with key diversions. On the off chance that you know you are effectively occupied, set a few rules for yourself. Try not to give them a chance to keep you up late during the evening so you sleep in the following morning and wind up setting yourself up for a rushed, distressing day.

5. Set suitable limits for intrusions. Life is loaded with interferences, yet we can figure out how to define limits that assistance us oversee them in solid ways. Timetable circumstances when you are "beyond reach." Let your calls go to phone message, kill your email, and choose to return to individuals after your "forbidden" time is finished. Trust the Holy Spirit to reveal to you when there is a genuine crisis.

6. Change your life. Request that God demonstrate you "out-of-the-container" approaches to spare time and inconvenience. For example, when I don't have sufficient energy to do the dishes, I utilize paper plates. What's more, in case I'm hosting a birthday gathering for one of my children and don't have room schedule-wise to make a dinner, we simply have cake and frozen yogurt.

7. Tune in for the Holy Spirit. On the off chance that you can see that your arrangement isn't creating peace, backpedal to God; petition God for peace and for intelligence to roll out improvements that will profit your life.

On the off chance that you can figure out how to put stock in God "in the now," get His effortlessness as you require it, and you can turn into a genuinely unworried individual my dear Friends :-)

Thank you so much Guys.

Stay Fit, take Care & Keep Smiling :-)

God Bless !!

Kranti Gaurav
XLRI Jamshedpur

नारियल से जुडी 10 ख़ास बातें

हम सभी जानते हैं पूजन कर्म में नारियल का महत्वपूर्ण स्थान है। किसी भी देवी-देवता की पूजा नारियल के बिना अधूरी मानी जाती है। भगवान को नारियल चढ़ाने से धन संबंधी समस्याएं दूर हो जाती हैं और प्रसाद के रूप में नारियल का सेवन करने से शारीरिक दुर्बलता दूर होती है। यहां जानिए नारियल से जुड़ी 10 खास बातें…

1. नारियल को श्रीफल कहा जाता है। ऐसा माना जाता है, जब भगवान विष्णु ने पृथ्वी पर अवतार लिया तो वे अपने साथ तीन चीजें- लक्ष्मी, नारियल का वृक्ष और कामधेनु लेकर आए थे।

2. नारियल के वृक्ष को कल्पवृक्ष भी कहा जाता है। नारियल में ब्रह्मा, विष्णु और महेश, तीनों ही देवताओं का वास माना गया है।

3. श्रीफल भगवान शिव को भी बहुत प्रिय है। नारियल में बनी तीन आंखों को शिवजी के त्रिनेत्र के रूप में देखा जाता है।

4. श्रीफल शुभ, समृद्धि, सम्मान, उन्नति और सौभाग्य का सूचक है। इसीलिए सम्मान करने के लिए शॉल के साथ श्रीफल भी दिया जाता है। रक्षाबंधन पर बहनें भाइयों को राखी बांध कर नारियल भेंट करती हैं और रक्षा का वचन लेती हैं।

5. स्त्रियों के लिए नारियल फोड़ना वर्जित है। इस संबंध में मान्यता है कि नारियल बीज रूप है, इसलिए इसे उत्पादन (प्रजनन) क्षमता से जोड़ा गया है। स्त्रियां प्रजनन की कारक हैं और इसी वजह से स्त्रियों के लिए बीज रूप नारियल को फोडऩा वर्जित किया गया है।

6. देवी-देवताओं को श्रीफल चढ़ाने के बाद पुरुष ही इसे फोड़ते हैं। नारियल से निकले जल से भगवान की प्रतिमाओं का अभिषेक भी किया जाता है।

7. नारियल की तासीर ठंडी होती है। ताजा नारियल कैलोरी से भरपूर होता है। इसमें अनेक पोषक तत्व होते हैं। जो कि हमारे स्वास्थ्य के लिए फायदेमंद हैं।

8. आमतौर पर नारियल को बधार कर यानी फोड़कर ही देवी-देवताओं को चढ़ाते हैं। इस संबंध में मान्यता है कि हम नारियल फोड़कर अपनी बुराइयों और अहंकार का त्याग करते हैं।

9. हनुमानजी की प्रतिमा के सामने नारियल अपने सिर पर से 7 बार वार कर फोड़ देना चाहिए। इससे बुरी नजर का असर खत्म होता है।

10. नारियल ऊपर से कठोर किंतु अंदर से नरम और मीठा होता है। हमें भी जीवन में नारियल की तरह बाहर से कठोर और अंदर से नरम व मधुर स्वभाव बनाना चाहिए। नारियल यही सीख हमें देता है।